Bitching About How Hard My Life Is(n't)

My lovely readers, nothing awful happened to me that day almost a month ago. I was overreacting, as per usual. I'm a very uppity person, really.

Here's the thing: I've begun putting a lot of pressure on myself to be the kind of person I THINK someone else wants me to be. The stupid thing is, this person and I aren't even really friends. I don't have his phone number, we've only hung out outside of class once, and...well, you get the picture. I have this overwhelming feeling that I'm not good enough.

I got a lot of that in high school. But in high school, the only reason I wanted to be good enough was to please my parents. I always felt like I was letting them down because I wasn't the sports kid - they desperately wanted a jock child. I see it in their eyes every time one of my cousins talks about his or her successes on the soccer or basketball or volleyball or football team. (Did I mention that the rest of my extended family is extraordinarily athletically gifted?)

Instead of that, I though I'd be the nerdy one: straight A's, high standardized test scores, thespian, Speech and Debate champion, involved in EVERYTHING. A general overachiever. Then my sporty cousins got full ride scholarships, higher test scores, and were elected presidents of their classes. I don't resent them at all. I'm very proud of them and I love them to death. I just feel a bit inadequate next to them.

I don't want to have to deal with that in college. I don't need to feel like I'm doing something wrong by being myself.

So, dear readers, that confidence I pretend like I have in myself? Kind of nonexistent. But I'm pretty convincing, no? 

Be Our Guest, Be Our Guest, Put Our Service To The Test!

I didn't only grow up on Harry Potter, you know. I also grew up on Disney movies. And The Little Rascals and The Three Stooges, but that's a different story.

My first movie in a theater was Disney's 101 Dalmations. I almost died when I was eight and got to spend three days in Disney World in Florida. Even today I make my family go to Magic Kingdom one day every year of spring break.

I am a little bit different from a lot of the other 1990s Disney girls, though. I am not really a princess person. Don't get me wrong, I had all the VCR tapes of the princess movies, but they weren't the same as the tales of adventure or just good old-fashioned fun.

What I really love most about the movies is their music. I think it's all just so fantastic. Just the other day, I realized there was a huge Disney void in my life, so I decided to get 50 of the original Disney songs to put on my iPod (none of that Disney Mania crap...).

Wanna hear a funny story? Yesterday I was on Cleverbot.com and it typed, "Let's get down to business." Me, being the Disney junkie I am, decided to add, "To defeat the Huns," like I'll Make A Man Out Of You from Mulan. From there, we quoted the whole song, alternating between lines. IT. WAS. AWESOME.

So now I'm convinced Disney is following me. I shall not forget thee, Walt! I promise!