Bitching About How Hard My Life Is(n't)

My lovely readers, nothing awful happened to me that day almost a month ago. I was overreacting, as per usual. I'm a very uppity person, really.

Here's the thing: I've begun putting a lot of pressure on myself to be the kind of person I THINK someone else wants me to be. The stupid thing is, this person and I aren't even really friends. I don't have his phone number, we've only hung out outside of class once, and...well, you get the picture. I have this overwhelming feeling that I'm not good enough.

I got a lot of that in high school. But in high school, the only reason I wanted to be good enough was to please my parents. I always felt like I was letting them down because I wasn't the sports kid - they desperately wanted a jock child. I see it in their eyes every time one of my cousins talks about his or her successes on the soccer or basketball or volleyball or football team. (Did I mention that the rest of my extended family is extraordinarily athletically gifted?)

Instead of that, I though I'd be the nerdy one: straight A's, high standardized test scores, thespian, Speech and Debate champion, involved in EVERYTHING. A general overachiever. Then my sporty cousins got full ride scholarships, higher test scores, and were elected presidents of their classes. I don't resent them at all. I'm very proud of them and I love them to death. I just feel a bit inadequate next to them.

I don't want to have to deal with that in college. I don't need to feel like I'm doing something wrong by being myself.

So, dear readers, that confidence I pretend like I have in myself? Kind of nonexistent. But I'm pretty convincing, no? 

College with Senioritis

The unfortunate thing about graduating high school is that senioritis doesn't go away. Here I am, in college for over 3 months now, and I still struggle daily with the plague that is known as senioritis.

That is my only excuse for not blogging. I'm just lazy. I haven't been busy, I don't "not have time" for it, I'm just downright, 100% lazy. I credit this to college not being challenging enough.

My high school prepared me very well for college. Unfortunately, they prepared me for a college that has more rigorous academics than Kent State. Now, when everyone asks me how college is, I unfortunately have to report that it's "too easy" and that I "have way to much free time on my hands."

Most people would jump for joy to have this sort of free time. For me, it's just a reminder of how anti-social I am. Have you noticed how often I'm on Tumblr nowadays? Don't get me wrong, I love hanging out with my friends and meeting new people. It's just very difficult to make time to be with people when they live a good half hour away from you.

Normally, this is the part of the blog post where I give you unsolicited advice on how to deal with the issue that I have brought up. When I figure out how to deal with laziness myself, I'll let you know. Pinky promise.

Summer Sun, Something's Begun

Actually, nothing's begun. Sadly. But hey, once summer's over, I'll be headed to college where I can be anyone I want to be. It's a fresh start. And college guys are a lot more open-minded than high school guys, right? Right? RIGHT? Damn.

A girl can dream.

But you know what I like about college already? How connected everyone is. Probably the best thing I've done since I found out I was headed to Kent State in the fall was joining the Kent 2015 page on Facebook. I have been friended by many of my future classmates and have even gotten a few new followers on Twitter.

I know, I know. Chances are, we might never meet in real life. Kent's a big place. But that doesn't change the fact that we are connected. If not by our courses or our majors or our routes to classes on campus, we're at least connected through the university. We all bleed blue and gold.

I'm a Golden Flash. I may not have been too proud of it before, but I swear, I'm going to be fiercely loyal to this university. And we all know what happens when I'm fiercely loyal to something.


Look out Kent, here I come.

You Must Be Impressive and Professional

Hey, guess what? I'M BAAAAAACK! I know, I know, it's been forever. And no promises I'll keep up, but I'll try my hardest.

So what's going on in the land of me? School (ugh). Senior year is proving to be one of the most stressful experiences I've ever been through. My Latin teacher told me it only gets worse from here. Sage advice. Not.

I was visiting Ohio University on Friday and I heard one of the most inspirational blog stories ever. This girl in their E.W. Scripps School of Journalism has a blog about My Chemical Romance. (It's apparently really good, so I'll have to check it out and post a link for you guys.) Well, she was contacted by Warner Brothers and they flew her out to LA so she could listen to and blog about their new album two weeks before it came out. WOW! Hopefully I'll gain respect like that from this blog...

HAHAHAHA, just kidding. I'll have to come up with something a lot better than my personal life to blog about in order to be successful like that.

Ahhh well. Cest la vie. Hopefully I'll post tomorrow!